Mark & Clare Miscellany 2019

Rail station announcements

Ladies and Gentlemen...

"The slow train to Hallway DIY Completion is delayed. Calling at Wallpaper Stripping, Bannister Demolition and Plastering in April, but not expected into Bannister Replacement and Hall Decoration until the New Year.

"The Saturday Rail and Sail from London to Mallorca has departed, calling at Marseille, Toulon and arriving into Alcudia on Sunday evening. The return journey will be via Barcelona. Highlights include snorkeling, trams, a farmstay, a sailing trip, learning to swim with armbands, and a multi-lingual Tapas evening.

"Business passengers to Hyderabad [Clare], your weekend connecting Camel Train via the Thar Desert departs from Jaisalmer. Enjoy your trip. Any other passengers will continue with work as normal.

"Due to evening childcare staffing shortages, the Amateur Dramatic Express will alternate drivers and continues via a drink-sodden spin bowler in Outside Edge and a snobby young lady in Pygmalion.

"The self-drive Ireland tour via Giant's Causeway has arrived. This service is electric. Please note, a ferry-replacement service is available from Birkenhead and from Dublin.

"Keen sheep-spotters in Sussex should look out for No.567 Clare's Lamb. Kindly given for her 30th Birthday.

"The daily commuter services to Metaswitch and ARUP continue to run reliably into their fifth year. New projects and opportunities result in high levels of job satisfaction.

"The Baby Brother Special is expected to arrive in March. Please await further announcements.